What are the basic misconceptions that parents have about their children?
What are the basic misconceptions that parents have about their children?
So thinking that all kids are the same parents have built up many misconceptions about their children. Every kid is different, and each kid has a personality. So, parents should stop putting their children in a box and assume every kid is the same. And since all kids are different, parents should raise each kid differently.
“There can be no keener revelation of a society’s soul than how it treats its children.”— Nelson Mandela
There isn’t a single method or a technique in raising a successful child. But there are a few things that you should stop assuming if you want your child to have healthy growth. So in this blog, I have mentioned some basic misconceptions that parents have about their children.
Some of the basic misconceptions that parents have about their children
Parents are never wrong
This is no longer misconception; it feels like reality and the truth of some parents. Once in a lifetime, a child from their parents has heard this dialogue. They don’t consider themselves wrong. However, experts are entirely aware that parents make mistakes most of the time. This misconception comes from those parents who want their children always to agree and follow them.
But humans make mistakes and learn from that mistakes. That’s why don’t put pressure on your child to be perfect.
Children don’t have any problems at home
Parents believe that if they fulfill their child’s necessities at home, they should be completely fine and have no issues. But it’s not true. A child whose needs are fulfilled still can have other issues. They can have problems related to their friends, school, their mental health. So parents should never assume that their children are fine once their needs are fulfilled.
My Child was born like that
Everyone is different from its birth. Parenting style and the surrounding environment affect the thinking type of children. Leaving the situation saying my child was born like that or I can’t do anything to improve them is the silliest misconception anyone can have. Activities like overuse of mobile phones, their watched series, limited physical movements can be the cause of problems. So take necessary actions to solve your child’s problem.
Children should not have privacy
Let me ask you a question? How do you feel when someone violates your privacy? How does it feel when someone always tries to be nosy in your personal life? It does not feel good, does it? No, it doesn’t. So if it doesn’t feel good when someone does not respect your privacy, then does it make your children feel good when you are constantly up in their face?
Children are human beings too. So, parents should respect their kids’ privacy. They should learn to give their kids personal space. It makes children believe that their parents trust them and boosts their confidence.
Children can’t make any decision
Parents believe that they should make all the decisions for their children. But that is not true. I am saying to let them make all their life decisions from the onset. Now and then, let your kids make their own decision.
What I am trying to say is, kids are smart enough to make decisions in their life. Children should be taught how to think rather than what to think. So let them make their own choices. If they succeed great, if they don’t, then that will be a learning moment for them.
Comparison helps children improve
Comparing your kids to others does not help your kids to improve. Rather it decreases the confidence of your kids. Every kid is different, and each kid has a personality. So the first thing a parent should do is stop putting their child in a box and compare it as if every kid is the same.
Children have their interests and aims, and parents should allow children to explore their interests. So, every kid is different. Some kids may be good in one field while others may be good in another. There is a famous saying that “Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”
For example, if your child is very good at playing football but is average in academics. It would help if you did not compare your kid to someone who has been doing good in academics. The comparison is just not valid. When you start to compare, the kid starts to lose focus on football and can neither perform well in academics. So stop comparing your kids with other kids.
If you give your kids phones, they will only play games
One of the biggest misconceptions parents have about their kids is that all kids do is play games on their phones. This assumption could not be more wrong. Yes, through mobile you can play games. But you have no idea how creative and recreational smartphones can be.
Smartphones can be an additional way of learning, apart from books or the classroom. With smartphones, kids can access learning resources such as encyclopedias, dictionaries, educational applications, and augmented reality flashcards. These applications are regularly updated to add new information, unlike a traditional textbook that remains the same over time. So, kids can do more than just play games on their smartphones.
Children learn everything at school
Parents believe that, once they admit their children to school, their job is done. They think that once they pay the school fee, it is now up to the teachers to teach them everything. But that bears hardly any truth.
Home should always be the first school for your child. Yes, the school should be responsible for all the academic learning of your children. But, academic learning is not all the learning required by your child. More than academics, your child should learn about moral learning, and that comes from home.
“The greatest legacy one can pass on to one’s children and grandchildren is not money or other material things accumulated in one’s life, but rather a legacy of character and faith.” — Billy Graham, evangelist.
So, teach your children about the values of character, discipline, honesty, obedience, and punctuality. It is completely up to parents to be responsible for their child’s upbringing. The more they learn about that today, the better the person they become tomorrow.
Children don’t suffer from mental health issues
Parents believe that mental health problems only affect adults. But in a real scenario, mental health problems affect not only adults but also children. They include conduct disorder, anxiety, depression and are often a direct response to their daily activities. According to the Mental Health Foundation of the UK, “Mental health problems affect about 1 in 10 children and young people.”
Therefore, make your child feel loved, understood, valued, trusted, and safe. Make them feel hopeful. Let them have control over their life. Protect kids from bullying and teach them to stand up for themselves.
Children are always on their phones
This statement has become a repetitive rant of parents. Parents always complain that kids nowadays are always on their phones. Then they start saying when they were kids; they never used phones. But is it true?
Let’s look at the generational gap. When parents were kids, they did not use the phone because smartphones were not even developed. So, they could not use it even if they wanted it. Yes, kids nowadays spend a lot of time on mobile phones, but that’s not a bad thing at all. They learn a lot by using smartphones and become creative.
When you scold your children, they behave better.
Scolding your kids doesn’t make them behave better. If you start scolding them every single time, your kids will start to feel worthless. They will be scared even to try something new. It is because they know that if they make a mistake, they will get scolded by you.
Make your kids feel like it is ok to make mistakes, and mistakes are a part of learning. Also, don’t scold or shame your kids in public. It’s not only humiliating, but it also decreases their confidence. Rather, talk to them politely and make them realize their mistake.
My child is exactly like me.
The list of basic misconceptions that parents have about their children is incomplete without this one. Every parent thinks their children are somehow precisely like them. And in appearance-wise, they might be true also. But behavior and interest-wise, they might not.
The guardians who think their children are exactly like them might force their children to do things according to them. As a result, they start ignoring the child’s interests and needs.
As a parent, you always want your child to be your better version, right? Then how is it possible if they are like you? But if they are, in case then they will face the same problem as you, correct? Start helping them solve. If you love the game cricket, your children are not required to love cricket, and they may like it or not.
Teachers are the problem.
There is no restriction in-home; children can do whatever they wish.
But school have some rules and regulation that every student have to follow. That’s why your children might face some challenges in school and have issues. Saying my child has no problem at home but has on teachers or schools is illogical.
My Final Thoughts
So these are some of the basic misconceptions that parents have about their children. I know you must be resonating with a lot of the above points. So my advice to you is to try to unlearn these misconceptions. Let them make mistakes and teach them to realize their mistakes. More importantly, teach them how to solve those mistakes. Give your kids wings so that they can fly and be whoever they want to be. Don’t try to chop those wings off and pull them to their ground.